Influential beings
18:25 Posted In social skills , work Edit This 0 Comments »
That insightful chat I had at the weekend affected me more than I thought.
Monday i was like a zombie and tuesday no better. The CEO made a blunt shot at me saying I looked 'drained' and wasn't portraying the image he wanted. This later evolved to I looked ugly, and as receptive as a brick wall. Nice.
It's hard to explain what I was feeling and well I thought I was more unwell physically but mental I don't know anymore. Perhaps his criticism isn't ringing any bells any more- instead they are breaking my barriers. Well it's obvious I'm letting my self down, I have put on 1/2 a stone in the last few months, how I'm not sure. I need to somehow look happy all the time knowing I have no money or long term co workers. i'll always be training ppl and hoping for the best and dealing with his tantrams.
My want for the project to succeed is still strong but whether I can work in that environment anymore is another question. He sat there for an hour calling me stupid and an idiot for not understanding the obvious. I'm not physcic and I definate envy anyone who is. Why can't I be appreicated for the work I do rather than BE expected tow ork like a race jockey becuase I'm an ethnic minority. All the white people who have been here are worships becuase they've bothered to give this project a second glance.
Monday i was like a zombie and tuesday no better. The CEO made a blunt shot at me saying I looked 'drained' and wasn't portraying the image he wanted. This later evolved to I looked ugly, and as receptive as a brick wall. Nice.
It's hard to explain what I was feeling and well I thought I was more unwell physically but mental I don't know anymore. Perhaps his criticism isn't ringing any bells any more- instead they are breaking my barriers. Well it's obvious I'm letting my self down, I have put on 1/2 a stone in the last few months, how I'm not sure. I need to somehow look happy all the time knowing I have no money or long term co workers. i'll always be training ppl and hoping for the best and dealing with his tantrams.
My want for the project to succeed is still strong but whether I can work in that environment anymore is another question. He sat there for an hour calling me stupid and an idiot for not understanding the obvious. I'm not physcic and I definate envy anyone who is. Why can't I be appreicated for the work I do rather than BE expected tow ork like a race jockey becuase I'm an ethnic minority. All the white people who have been here are worships becuase they've bothered to give this project a second glance.
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